— and How Parents Can Build Them at Home**
By Dr. Santosh V. Kondekar
(www.autismdoctor.in)
When parents say,
“My child knows many things but still cannot manage daily life,”
they are actually describing a difficulty in Executive Function.
Executive function is not about intelligence.
It is about using intelligence in daily life.
It is the brain’s CEO system — the part that helps a child:
Start a task
Stay on it
Shift when needed
Remember steps
Control impulses
Finish what they begin
In autism, this CEO system develops slowly. That is why children may:
Know words but not use them
Know what to do but not do it
Learn but not apply
Understand but not organize
What Are Executive Function Skills?
Executive functions include:
What it looks like in daily life
Skill
Planning
Knowing what to do first, next, and last
Working memory
Holding instructions in mind
Attention
Staying focused
Self-control
Not acting impulsively
Organization
Keeping things in order
Flexibility
Changing when things don’t go as planned
A child with weak executive skills may:
Forget instructions
Jump from one activity to another
Get stuck on one thing
Get angry when plans change
Be unable to complete even simple routines
This is not laziness.
This is brain wiring.
Why Autism Affects Executive Function
Autism is primarily a disorder of:
Attention
Awareness
Sensory integration
Meaning-making
The frontal lobe (the planning brain) receives poor input from listening, seeing, and understanding.
So the child’s brain has ideas but no roadmap.
Just like a GPS without satellite signal.
That is why teaching executive skills is more important than teaching academics.
How Parents Can Build Executive Function at Home
You do not need expensive therapy.
You need structure, language, and repetition.
1. Talk through everything
Narrate daily life:
“Now we open the box. Now we take the spoon. Now we eat.”
This builds mental sequencing — the base of planning.
2. Break tasks into steps
Instead of:
“Get ready”
Say:
Wear shirt
Wear pants
Wear shoes
The brain learns how to organize actions.
3. Use visual schedules
Pictures of:
Wake up
Brush
Eat
School
Play
Sleep
The brain learns to predict and plan.
4. Teach waiting and turn-taking
Games like:
Rolling a ball
Board games
Passing objects
This builds impulse control and working memory.
5. Use stories and sequencing
Ask:
“What happened first?”
“Then what?”
“What happened last?”
This builds time awareness and logic.
6. Let the child solve small problems
Do not rush to fix:
Missing shoe
Toy not fitting
Block not matching
Struggle builds problem-solving circuits.
Listening Builds Executive Function
A brain that listens:
Organizes
Predicts
Plans
Controls
That is why Dr Kondekar’s protocol emphasizes verbal exposure, conversations, and stories before pushing academics.
No listening = No planning
No planning = No executive function
Final Message for Parents
Your child does not need more pressure.
Your child needs more guided experiences.
Executive function is not taught by worksheets.
It is built by:
Talking
Doing
Repeating
Organizing
Waiting
Storytelling
Every small routine you create is building the CEO of your child’s brain.
And that CEO will decide how independent, calm, and successful your child becomes.
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